08 January 2010

Comparison Four

I typed out for you part of my vows from my wedding in July 1998. What's funny is, I had so much trouble with the submission part. I was brought up by a woman who worked in corporate America for 30 years, not a feminist, but definitely not someone who wanted me to be a doormat. Don't you love that phrase! Me too.

I had some discussion with the pastor who married us. He made it clear that he was leaving that part in- it was from the Bible. He tried to explain it to me, but it was "meat" and I was still on baby bottles at that point. I made sure he said the part about James loving me like the church- I told him that my submission was contingent on that point. He agreed that James should do so but let the "contingent upon" phrase out. Now I smile.

Now, I understand a lot better what it means. Having spent some time in the Air Force helped me understand. It's not what the world would have us think; it's about authority and responsibility and chain of command. I tremble for my husband at times when I think of him answering to God. I need to take care of my responsibilities and my attitude and my heart.

Now, I revel in my position. It's not my job to try to control everything. It's not my job to do many unpleasant things. What freedom and protection a woman under a man's wing has!

anyway, here's the vows:

"The Apostle Paul writes about this love in the book of Ephesians: "Husbands, love your wife, just as Christ loves those who are His, and gave Himself up for her. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own body, but he nourishes and cares for it." God's word continues: "For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one body."

" Tracy, as you know, the Bible commands wives to be submissive to their husbands. It will help if we understand the Bible's teaching on submission rather than our culture's teaching. Without any loss of dignity, Tracy, you are to submit because of James' spiritual leadership. Submission is based on James' "reverence for Christ" rather than any selfish motives. Because the Bible talks about mutual submission, it includes being united as one towards a common goal- supporting and encouraging.

"The Bible does not force you, James, to demand this submission and obedience. Love does impose obligations, but it does not make demands. Response if voluntary as ours is to God's love. If James loves as Christ, submission will easily follow. And then your union will demonstrate to all those around you the self-sacrificing love that the Lord Jesus has for all people.

"The Bible instructs you Tracy: '...submit to your husband as to the Lod. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church... Therefore, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything."

"James, will you lead Tracy as head of this home and love her as Scripture instructs? Tracy, will you submit to James the way Scripture instructs?" "We will!"


I'm honored that you would read New Mercy and
I would love to hear from you through comments!
Teresa (Tracy) Dear

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